My quarterly roundup of notable comments/quips from Cyclone Fanatic, January-March 2023.
Merely a sample of amusements I encountered & documented. If anyone recalls a nugget I missed, please add to thread.
Some entries have been edited for clarity, brevity, spelling or what-not(s).
KEY:
Bold is thread title (or summary of it) ...
"***" indicates break in narrative flow.
Nominee for “Thread Title of the Quarter”:
Somebody is walking by and spitting on my dog
***Iowa State vs. Oklahoma Game Day Thread***
@HFCS: When you watch that game tracker, the line on the graph looks like the patient died.
Strange Snacks/Odd Foot Combinations
@NATEizKING: I can eat mustard on anything ... sticky rice, Fruity Pebbles, tequila shots ... anything.
Side job/side hustle ideas
@ScottyP: Our family budget is going to get extremely tight for the next couple of years, with two kids in daycare. Any recommendations for side jobs to help supplement income?
@coolerifyoudid: Can you coach special teams?
When you win Powerball or Mega Lottery (thread continued from 2022)
@LeaningCy: If I win, prepare to feast your eyes on a second, identical pedestrian bridge.
***
@CyclonesRock: After careful consideration and consulting with family and friends, I would like to announce I am placing my $2 winnings in the lottery transfer portal. I will purchase a Powerball ticket and will be forever grateful to Mega Millions for the opportunity. It is not about the money, I just feel Powerball will be a better fit for me...
Most valuable men’s basketball player so far
@pourcyne: Conrad Hawley … He is the Hester of Millennials.
ISU’s top highly touted busts of all time
@cytor: My junior-year girlfriend had a highly touted bust. I'm putting her on my list.
Sweet Caroline
@intrepid27: I love it when the team is winning enough that we get to debate insignificant stuff. Personally, I think the team should wear taller socks.
Rotations with Jaz back
@Clonefan32: I started this thread with the hopes we’d have a comparative analysis of Bob Jones and Jared Homan, and you fools fell right into it!
My wife says I’m condescending
@carvers4math: I’ve never considered CF to have any insight into women other than JLH, so good luck!
Iowa State ranked No. 12 in latest AP poll…
@twincyties: Are we the only team in the conference without a weird hand signal that involves a gun or an animal?
Help us, Mr. Science
@dafarmer: What earworm question is in your head that no one answers, like why do whiskers not grow all over your face and stop below your eyes?
@KnappShack: Because I'm not a goddam wolf. Next question!
***
@PSYclone22: Why haven't we built a perpetual motion machine yet?
@cdnlngld: Entropy.
@Entropy: Yeah, sorry about that.
MBB Computer Projections Thread
@Gunnerclone: Someone tell me what our record would be if we filter out all of the wins.
***
@isufbcurt: Can I get our NET ranking if Eli, Hasson, Watson, Bob and Conrad were the only guys playing? This will tell us the true ranking of ISU.
Mike Miles?
(OP): Anyone know if Mike Miles is playing tomorrow?
@Cyforce: I’m sure somebody does.
Is Iowa State even a tournament team? (Parody of the original thread)
@Gunnerclone: Whether we’re in or out, it’s clear this team doesn’t deserve either outcome.
***Auto-Bid Madness 2023***
@1UNI2ISU: I hate this stupid game. When can we enter for next year?!
Watson
@VeloClone: Play Holmes and Watson together more. It is elementary.
(Combined) Bracket Thoughts / ***Official March Madness NCAA Tournament Thread***
@CoachHines3: Colgate over Texas, ‘cuz f*** Texas.
@cyphoon: Colgate frickin’ invented toothpaste. They sure as hell can beat Texas.
***
(nominated by @CycloneRulzzz)
@GTO: Golgate got pasted.
@stormchaser2014: They fought tooth and nail, but decayed at the end.
***
@Die4Cy: Why does Brad Underwood dress like he sells Lincolns in 1977?
***
@HoopsTournament: FAU will play FDU.
@nfrine: There will be a lot of F’ing around.
***
@exCYtable: These Miami uniforms are hideous. Looks like Halloween had sex with a Christmas tree.
USC-UCLA To Big Ten (continuous)
@FriendlySpartan: The love of prime JLH on this board is one of my favorite aspects.
@jcyclonee: She’s so GIFable.
@Cyclonscin: Is
that how you say it?
New Pepsi Logo
cydonk: How f’ing bored are you, nobody gives a turd?
@Gonzo: Dude, "boring" doesn't even begin to describe my dullness.
