Friday OT #2 - Six Feet Under
- Thread starter Angie
- Start date
Haven't put much thought into it other than they damn well better take anything that is usable to others from me first.
I've done some hiking for the last 10 or so years out in Colorado. If you're gonna let my ashes fly, do it on the top of one of those peaks.
If I could heart this a million times I would.
People always say the wrong thing at the time too.
Just want to be buried with the rest of the family and only funeral aspect I care about is “On Eagle’s Wings.” When one of my kids heard it at church, he thought it was from LOTR
Cremation vs burial is a conversation we need to have with family, sooner rather than later. I leaned towards cremation but had family express strong feelings in favor of burial, so need to find out if that has changed.
In terms of a service, I lean towards playing a bunch of favorite rock songs, and if someone wants to say something, great, but no minister etal since nobody of that sort knows me well enough to provide any thoughts besides generic platitudes.
And as a "final message" to remember me by as everyone starts to leave, play Joe Walsh's I.L.B.T.'s to lighten things up.
In terms of a service, I lean towards playing a bunch of favorite rock songs, and if someone wants to say something, great, but no minister etal since nobody of that sort knows me well enough to provide any thoughts besides generic platitudes.
And as a "final message" to remember me by as everyone starts to leave, play Joe Walsh's I.L.B.T.'s to lighten things up.
I was just going to say something similar. For anyone who doesn't want a funeral or cremation, or doesn't care, consider looking into donating your body for science. I believe, at least in Iowa, there is no cost, and the recipient organization arranges for pickup, transport, etc. There is a strong chance that your body will be used for future doctors education, such as disection at the University of Iowa, so if you've considered a "F*&$ Iowa" tattoo, maybe go ahead and go for it.
Also, as a recent recipient of some salvaged parts from someone else who passed, I'm a proponent of organ and tissue donation.
Organ donation then cremate me and spread my ashes somewhere. The place will depend on who is doing the spreading, as I'd like it to be a place special that's between me and the person doing it.
The wife has expressed a strong desire to be cremated and forgo any ceremony. I finally had to tell her the other day that the ceremony is for the survivors, not the deceased, and if she goes first and the kids want a funeral, she’s getting one.
I’m confident that she’ll be sure that I’ll go first, now.
I’m confident that she’ll be sure that I’ll go first, now.
The thing you have to think about is that the service isn't for the dead person. I don't care what my family does with me. They can do whatever they want.
My grandma didn't want any type of service, but her kids had a visitation since the visitation is more for the family and it was healing for them to have.
So all of you that don't want anything, make sure that you allow for your family to have something if that would be important to them.
My grandma didn't want any type of service, but her kids had a visitation since the visitation is more for the family and it was healing for them to have.
So all of you that don't want anything, make sure that you allow for your family to have something if that would be important to them.
No funeral service.
Family visitation-but not your traditional stand in line stuff. Preferably no open casket. Play all my favorite music in the background.
Family & very close friends only at burial - no music or songs, just a few words and put me in the ground
Theme: keeping fun in funeral
My Mom used to say she wanted to be cremated, her ashes put in a Roy Rogers lunchbox and buried with my Dad. And at the end of the funeral, she wanted "Happy Trails" to be played. She's changed her mind on all of that now - I think my Dad has made enough comments that he coerced her into changing what she wants.
My husband I discussed this. He feels the family visitation is for the surviving members. So we've told our son no funeral service, just the visitation only.
My grandma was in her mid 80s when she passed and she insisted no visitation or funeral service. She said most of their friends were already deceased or would not be able to make it. Just the family (immediate and extended) was at a graveside service prior to burial.
She has a point. My grandfather passed away in his 80s after a long decline with Alzheimer's. Some family came to his visitation but other than that hardly anyone came and it was somewhat shocking (although maybe at least I took this personally as none of my friends came nor did any of my wife's family). Longtime neighbors that are basically like extended family came to the funeral but that was basically it.
So if they are older with friends that have passed away and/or have been cut off from then for other reasons it may not be attended.
My wife passed away at a relatively young age last year. The line at the visitation was so long, I never thought it would end. And man, I wanted it to just be over with. But I sure didn't feel like partying. Even going out with 13 friends of my wife and mine to toast her with her favorite drink after the funeral was hard to do. Fast forward a year, we toasted her memory and had a good time doing so. Not to be a downer, but funerals usually suck for the immediate family at the time they are happening,
My buddy's dad passed in February, they held off on a celebration of life until May, then rented out a shelter at City park, had a Taco truck live music and a bunch of beer. Seemed like the way to go. No awkward line where my remaining family has to take condolences from people they barely know.
A friend’s 40 something year old daughter died in the heart of Covid. She fought breast cancer for two years and we all saw it coming. Her brother has an auto immune disease. They specifically said the church funeral was immediate family only, as the daughter wanted her funeral to be a Mass. Sure enough, even with a sign on the church door, some bozo crashed the funeral.
So if you want family only at anything, keep a tight lip about the time and I guess maybe even get security cause people don’t care what the family wants apparently.
So if you want family only at anything, keep a tight lip about the time and I guess maybe even get security cause people don’t care what the family wants apparently.