If you came across adult pics/videos of someone you knew, would you tell them?

cyrocksmypants

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Dec 29, 2008
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I’m like, 20% positive that I came across a video of an employee. I realize that’s not a huge percentage, but when most cases you can be over 99% positive it’s not them, it’s big.

Anyway, I’ve thought about this a lot over time as I’ve managed a LOT of people (in the thousands over my time). If you saw something of a friend or family meme we or co-worker or something would you tell them?

I guess I kind of look at it two ways. There’s consensual online posting of that stuff and non-consensual, and I kind of feel like that’s the line that gets crossed. But even if it’s non-consensual, do you go up to a co-worker at work and be like “yeah, I was just cruising reddit for some porn the other day and came across your picture in a six-way?”

If they were YOUR pics/videos, would you want a friend or co-worker to tell you?
 
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I’m like, 20% positive that I came across a video of an employee. I realize that’s not a huge percentage, but when most cases you can be over 99% positive it’s not them, it’s big.

Anyway, I’ve thought about this a lot over time as I’ve managed a LOT of people (in the thousands over my time). If you saw something of a friend or family meme we or co-worker or something would you tell them?

I guess I kind of look at it two ways. There’s consensual online posting of that stuff and non-consensual, and I kind of feel like that’s the line that gets crossed. But even if it’s non-consensual, do you go up to a co-worker at work and be like “yeah, I was just cruising reddit for some porn the other day and came across your picture in a six-way?”

If they were YOUR pics/videos, would you want a friend or co-worker to tell you?
Methinks thou watcheth too much porn.
 
This kind of depends on 1) where you saw them and 2) whether they mentioned your place of business. If someone intentionally uploaded pictures to a web site and did not mention where they worked, it's kind of their business. If there is a chance the pictures were unknowingly posted by someone else or they are referenced your place of business, then it may be worth mentioning.
 
Also, while the other employee IS attractive, my gut reaction was if like I had seen a family member. Definitely was just embarrassed to have seen it, not turned on, despite what porns may have taught us about boss/employee relationships.
 
This kind of depends on 1) where you saw them and 2) whether they mentioned your place of business. If someone intentionally uploaded pictures to a web site and did not mention where they worked, it's kind of their business. If there is a chance the pictures were unknowingly posted by someone else or they are referenced your place of business, then it may be worth mentioning.
I can agree with that. Like if they’re banging in the back room with company branding all over the place?
 
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If you wanted to tell them, but not tell them yourself, you could type up a letter notifying them. Just tell them what you saw and how to find it and let them make the decision on what to do. Of course, do it all anonymously.
 
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Maybe just say that you came across a video of their early work and they may have a future in acting? If they look confused, it probably wasn't uploaded intentionally. But if they want to go into detail about the process of filming, just end the conversation and don't ever speak to them again.
 
Similarly, would you tell your friend/relative if you saw adult pics/video online of their s/o (not with the friend/rel)? Asking for a friend
 
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I will clarify, with my example, I have no intentions of saying anything because 1. 20% is not nearly a high enough confidence rating 2. The act looked consensual and 3. It looked like something they at least would have known had a good chance of making it to the internet.

It more just got me thinking. About a decade ago I had an employee with a vengeful ex that posted her photos on facebook and that kind of got me started on “how would I even feel about seeing that?” because I tend to separate work and personal so much that I don’t think I could even look at my employees in a sexual way.
 
It's a tough call especially if you are only about 20% sure. It also depends on whether this person is male or female. A guy you could kind of joke that you saw someone that looks like them on a Reddit thread.
 
If you would even consider approaching a coworker with something like this you need a visit from...
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